Friday 24 November 2017

Esther: Zachary

Italy, 2048

Oh my god Esther he's driving me crazy. Eddie's thoughts ran through my head. I laughed, laying my book down on my bed and closed my eyes to communicate with my best friend.
Come stay with me for a while. I suggested.
Esther he is like a child, he and my uncle are bffs. He sighed showing me Zac and Emmett laughing and joking around. I smiled at the memory.
You can't smile at it. He scolded me.


Zac lost his wife, his kids want nothing to do with him. Let the man have some fun.
Well you tell me that after you've spent a month with him.
You go back to England in a week, I'm sure you can last.
Well actually the entire family is coming to Italy for the summer. You didn't know?
You too? I asked letting the excitement build up inside me.
Chloe and I haven't decided. we thought we might for a few weeks at least and head back to England for the Wrights annual summer get together.
Oh of course. I said as i began climbing off my bed. Let me know anyway.
You'll know the minute we decide. He reminded me and I laughed. That was true. We were becoming more and more linked as time passed, sometimes I didn't even realise he was in my head. He was becoming my subconscious.
It turned out Eddie and Chloe did come with their family to Italy that year. The Cullen's arrived the first week in May and didn't plan on leaving until August.
The Volturi part of our family loved it, myself included. It was nice having my best friends around again. Even if Eddie and I were becoming subconsciously closer and it was like he was never not around.
Mine and Zac relationship was a weird one. I wasn't exactly sure how he would react to me, the last time we saw each other he was a married man, just turned. The time before that he was a teenage boy with a major crush on me. I didn't expect him to be cold and distant towards me. Not when he was officially a Cullen now, it was like I didn't exist. I mean I wasn't that annoyed about it personally but others were noticing it.
“What did you do to him Esther? Murder his wife?” Emmett asked me when Zac left the room because I entered. I glared at Emmett.
“Don't joke like that Em” Rosalie scolded him. Zac’s wife had committed suicide. It wasn't something anyone spoke about.
“The dudes been cold to her for three weeks. I was just wondering what she had done.”
“Nothing” I said in my defence.
“You haven't read his mind to find out why he's so mean?” Emmett asked me.
“No, he deserves privacy. I have no idea what he's going through, he deserves more than having mind readers invading his head,” I said as I fell into the couch by Eddie. He reached out and pulled me into his side. I relaxed into my best friends embrace.
“He’ll come around,” he whispered into my ear.
Do you know why he's acting like that to only me? I asked him.
I have been staying out of his mind just as much as you. The dudes depressed.
He is? I asked suddenly worried for the man.
He feels better with us. That's what matters. He's got to get through this himself. He said softly but I nodded in agreement. If I was in Zac's position I wouldn't want me or Eddie pestering him to talk about it.
“So Es... Esther, what do you do for fun around here?” Emmett asked. I narrowed my eyes at the nickname and he quickly corrected himself.
“Read?” I asked him and he groaned.
“We're here for family not fun,” Rose told her husband and they began bickering. Whilst it was obviously annoying to the pair themselves I had to smile. Even fighting there was an aura of eternal love, that whilst Rose was adamant about being here for her grandchildren and family duties, Emmett was just a little bored and needed fun. It must have been about thirty minutes later of the Cullen's just talking amongst themselves and starting up a game of 'never have I ever' when I felt my daughter requesting my attention.
Mama we need you in court. My daughters voice echoed in my head. I often had to show my face in court. People still questioned Matthews heritage from time to time. He used to combat this by wiping their minds or throwing them in a cell for a few weeks but with me living so close I was far too handy for him to use. If the sight of Lidiya and Anelie didn't scare them I was often called in. Lidiya and Anelie were still building their reputation, word had spread about what they could do but many didn't believe it, many came to question them or test them in person. The girls hated to cave into pressure and didn't want to be a circus trick and so Matthew tended to use me to distract, most of the time it worked. A little show of my abilities and ninety percent of challengers backed down. At the end of the day the Volturi had the protection they needed in the life and death twins if anyone truly had the guts to test it out with a war. In the mean time, my abilities proved rather handy to Matthew, especially my copy of his mothers mind altering. Although it wasn't as nearly as strong as Chantelle's was proving to be as she grew older, it was handy with a simple rebellious vampire or witch and I was happy to help. Being here showed me the type of man my daughter loved and the person Matthew truly was, and he was not Aro as I had once feared.
I stood, leaving the Cullen's to their little game that was quickly becoming a game of 'who has the most embarrassing story', giving Eddie a quick explanation as he dropped his arms from me and headed to the main court room. On the way Lidiya gave me a rundown of the subject and their purpose for the court. They were offering a  'joint leadership' and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. As I reached the back door to the court, one of the guard members, Alicia was holding my robe out ready. I smiled at her gratefully and took it, throwing it on quickly as I stepped through the door.
The whole room fell silent.
"You know one day I'd like to just spend time with my family, instead I have to deal with incessant little insects like you that still dare to question the authority of Matthew Cullen." I sighed striding up to the subject in the room. He cowered and stepped back. He had supporters rallying around him and they nudged him so he stood straight again. He cleared his throat but I had already been in his mind to see what he was about to say. He knew I would intercede and tried to prepare himself before hand but I had been more than he ever expected.
"I question his heritage" he managed to say but his voice was weak and faltering. Whilst many didn't believe my daughters abilities were true, the stories of my own were slightly more believable and if they didn't believe before they saw me, they certainly did once they had met me.
"He is the grandson of Aro, true born Volturi leader, why on earth is that questionable?" I said turning to look at Matthew sitting on his thrown, his legs crossed as he lounged back, he was smirking, enjoying the interrogation. I shook my head slightly with a laugh when I turned back to the subject.
I'm doing your job again amore. I placed in his head.
It's entertaining. I've had three hours of court, it's nice to see someone else help out once in a while. He answered me. I sent him an aura of the love I had for him and that I didn't mind at all when I turned back to the vampire in front of me.
I soon realised when the doors opened that his was more than just one person and a few friends. A crowd of people followed, I saw in their heads they were running late but had planned to be here from the start. I looked at Matthew, concerned at the number that followed this man.
How do you want to do this? Show of force? I asked him.
You are the show of force. He said, his poker face unchanged but his stature straightened, he was now less relaxed. I looked to my girls standing behind him with Tony, he was scanning the crowd, his wolf instincts sensing the possible danger and I saw Anelie place her hand on his arm. Lidiya hand falling to her pregnant stomach, we weren't sure exactly what species her child would be but it seemed to follow the growth rate of a regular hybrid. She was visibly about six month pregnant but hid it well under her robes.
Girls? I asked.
If we need to, yes. Lidiya replied without having to explain a thing. I sighed and turned back to the vampire who was watching curiously wondering what we were going to do.
"Now who's going to be the sacrificial lamb?" I asked him. He smiled cockily.
"We know those twins of yours are fakes. No one can control life and death. Not even you, oh mighty Esther Cullen," a vampire said from behind the leader viciously.
"You know one thing that still surprises me about humanity this late in my very long life is your ignorance, coupled with your arrogance." I said bitterly and the leader, whose name I had plucked from the minds around us was Jorge, dropped into a defence crouch to snarl. I stepped back, disgusted at the proximity of him and he took this as a recoil, providing him with incentive to make a move on me. I blocked his advancement with my right arm, the impact launching him backwards. This erupted the others and they all fell into matching stances, their eyes on me. I saw the guard members in the room tense, ready to attack on Matthew's command. Some of them, my few close friends and Ezra included felt like they were being tortured with the urge to protect me. Matthews hand raised, telling them to back down and I projected to them I would be okay and to dodge the bodies. I didn't have time to hear any replies. The first few vampires charged and I easily rebuked their advances. The next wave paused before looking at each other for confirmation. Their leader was back on his feet and heading towards me as I began to rebuke the snarling onslaught. None of them even made it a foot into my proximity.
Jorge held his hand up stopping the charge and stepping out to the front again.
I sighed out loud, did he seriously think he had a chance?
"Maybe I didn't hit you hard enough," I retorted as he came back to me. I  heard a few guard members laugh.
"You may have the strength of a thousand vampires but all that means to me is I need a thousand vampires to beat you and I will," he snarled and I couldn't contain my unprofessional laugh.
"I'm immortal you idiot. A thousand vampires couldn't pull me apart never mind have the endurance to reach me," I answered back. Before he could answer the two men beside him fell to the floor. I turned to see Lidiya walking towards me, Anelie's hand in hers.
No one threatens you in front of us. Ever. Anelie said, her eyes meeting mine and I smiled proudly at her.
Jorge turned as he watched his followers dropped one by one to the ground.
"Lidy," Matthew whispered quietly but urgently and I saw in his head his concern of her over using her ability and the fear for their child. I projected his worries to my daughter and she straightened up, her piercing eyes relaxing as she turned to look at Jorge. She had dropped about six of his followers but it was enough, even with the fifty still behind him, he had the proof he needed. He didn't stand a chance.
He fell to his knees instantly. The entire room copying and they bowed their heads in complete submission.
I turned to see Matthew had stood and walked to meet his wife at the edge of the platform that separated the high guard and leaders from the subjects. He nodded to Anelie and she turned to the six dead, giving them back their life. Within moments they had copied those around them, falling to their knees at Anelie's feet.
"Do you swear to forget this obscene mission of usurpation and lay your loyalties at the feet of me and my guard?" Matthew announced and I could see in each and every one of their minds that they agreed, not one ounce of disbelief left.
"We do" they all chorused, except for one. I blocked the view of Jorge to my children and he raised his head. Hatred burning there. I saw in his mind that although he wanted to live he would never truly be submissive to Matthew. I reached out, my hands around his neck and lifted him off his knees.
"Esther," Matthew warned me behind him.
"Lidiya," I said out loud and her eyes zeroed in on Jorge.
"No, I just want to live. I don't want to die. I can't submit but I can promise to stay away. I won't bother you again, you'll never see me," he pleaded. I lowered him to his feet and he watched Lidiya with scared eyes.
"Esther my dear, please ensure this man sticks by his word," Matthew said softly and I turned and placed my hands on Jorge's head. Creating an ingrained resistance to his desires to rebel.
"Done," I announced and stepped back, jumping backwards onto the platform next to my daughters.
"Is there anyone else that dares to question the power behind my leadership?" Matthew announced and the visitors stayed silent. "Then you are dismissed," he announced and the doors opened. Various members of the guard led the visitors out of the court room, ensuring they found their ways back to where they belonged.
"Court dismissed. Thank you for your service today my friends," Matthew announced to the remaining guard and they all began chattering as they walked out, leaving myself with my daughters and two son in laws.
"You know I don't think I would have been able to keep this up without you coming to live with me," Matthew said as he visibly relaxed and wrapped his arms around his wife.
"You would have. It would have just taken a little bit more diplomacy," I smiled at him.
"Thank you," he said to all three of us.
"It's what we're here for. You," Lidiya said softly to her husband as she returned his hug.
"You are the best man for this job and if I can use my power to keep it that way then I won't hesitate a second," I told him and he captured my gaze for a moment. His mind hearing my words but not accepting them.
I think my father is truly the best person for this.
The fact he isn't here proves that you are wrong. I told him. He smiled at me for a moment before holding Lidiya closer to him for a moment.
The five of us left the court for some much needed rest. As I exited I saw Zac standing across the hall, a dark black robe and hood over his head. Had he been in court?
"You are so amazing," he said to me almost in awe from across the corridor. My children had disappeared down the hall with their other halves and it was just me and Zac.
"You were in there?" I asked.
"I have enjoyed the occasional court session whilst I've been here. It's entertaining to watch. It's better than Judge Judy," he grinned his cocky Zac smile. It was infectious. I smiled back and walked closer to him. "That was just phenomenal. I knew you were good but the way the room fell silent when you entered, the way you knocked them back like they were no stronger than a human child, the way they fell to their knees in front of your girls. Jesus. You only see that kind of stuff in movies" he said in awe.
"So are we talking now?" I asked him and his smile dropped instantly. When he didn't reply I continued. "Can we talk somewhere private?"  I clarified and he nodded, pulling the hood off his head and making his way to the guest quarters. I followed silently and we reached the room he was 'using' on the third floor.
"So you are finally ready to face me?" he said as we made it into the room. He stripped the robe revealing his white, rather tight shirt underneath.
“Excuse me?” I asked following him out to the balcony of his room. He turned to look at me and I took in his appearance. The setting sun shone off his marble chest and arms, causing them to sparkle just slightly, the wind was carrying his scent to me at the door way. It was different from when he was a teenager, so was his face. It was so much more mature than he used to be, the years had aged him well.
He was beautiful.
“I've been cold towards you for the entire time I've been here and you're only just talking to me now?” he asked. His freshly hunted gold eyes staring at me, holding my attention. I sighed biting my lip as I leant on the balcony.
“For starters, you're the one that's been avoiding me all this time. When I tried to talk to you the day you arrived you shrugged me off and turned to talk to my daughter. I am nearly four thousand years old. I've learnt not to be hurt by other peoples moods. I knew I hadn't done anything to hurt you. We haven't seen each other in nearly twenty years. I just figured you didn't want to be my friend. That I'm okay with,” I said truthfully.
“You haven't read my mind have you?” he asked in astonishment.
“Of course I haven't Zachary. You're grieving, I don't need to read your mind to see that,” I said softly and he just laughed. His laugh was like music. So different to when he was a young adult. “You're laughing?” I asked in astonishment. His chuckles settled and he turned to look out over the town below us. We stood in silence for a few minutes before his head fell into his hands.
“Will you just read my mind please?” he said exasperated.
“Excuse me?” I asked for clarification.
“Please. I feel if I try to explain I won't say it right,” he said turning to look at me. His eyes were burning, watching my face for any sign of anything. I frowned but his facial expressions convinced me he was serious so I complied.
At first it was confusing. There were so many emotions and thoughts running through his head. So much more complex than he used to be as a teenager. The most I saw was guilt. He felt horrible for what happened to his wife. Even though her letter had insisted it wasn't him his sons still blamed him and he still blamed himself. Adding onto that guilt was the first moment he saw me again. The pure emotion that ran through him seeing me in the court room, the small smile I greeted him with and the unadulterated desire that filled him. Like nothing had changed. Like he was sixteen again when I gave him the time of day.
The entire time I spent in his mind he didn't take his eyes off me once. I could see myself through his eyes as he watched me in curiosity.
“It's funny isn't it? That every time I see you it's like nothing has changed and you're Esther again. You're unchanged and yet I've aged twenty years and lived a lifetime,” he said softly. I smiled at him, the lifetime part was definitely right.
“Why do you feel guilty?” I asked him taking a step towards him but not too close.
“Because my wife died barely a year ago and I'm already lusting after another woman… its wrong I know it is but it's you… there's just no other words other than that. it's like I can't turn it off, no matter how much I try, I've wanted you since I was sixteen and even a wife and a life away from you didn't change that. I'm a horrible person.”
“For knowing what you want?” I asked with a frown but continued before he could reply. “Your wife took her own life. She didn't love you or she wouldn't have done that to you,” I tried to comfort him. Suicide was a touchy subject but i knew in this situation that Zac shouldn't blame himself, “I know that you think this is wrong and that's why nothing can happen yet but Zac…” I said carefully and he turned to look at me with pleading eyes. I leant up and gently kissed him, his arms fell to my waist. keeping me close to him but I used my strength to stop the kiss. I stayed in his arms and waited for him to open his eyes. It had only been a peck but it was the first ever inclination from me that I returned his feelings.
“You need to fully grieve and be ready for this. Take a month, a year, ten years. Whatever you need. know that I'm not going anywhere, that I will be here, waiting and ready to try whatever it is we have. I wasn't ready for you forty years ago, and I really don't think you were ready for me either, but you're different now. I want to be with you as much as you do with me. I'm just not willing to chase the shadow of your guilt” I whispered and his eyes closed again, a small smirk spreading across his lips.
“Is it stupid to say thank you?” he sighed, his forehead falling to mine.
“It is. Is this why you've been avoiding me? Because you feel guilty for wanting me?” I clarified. He nodded, barely moving his head from mine.
“Zachary, you will quickly learn that being immortal is both a burden and a blessing. Time gradually starts to mean nothing. In fact I forgot what it even meant until I had my daughters and saw them grow. Time to me felt like a minute or a year. I had no concept of it. Especially when I was in hiding. Time is relative to your own self. If you finish grieving your estranged wife in a month no one will judge you, just like if it took you a hundred years. You know Nicole wasn't your mate. You were human when you married her. Had you stayed human you would have had a lifetime with her then died and not known any difference. You're immortal, you don't change and others around you do. Your children are going to grow old and die, that affects an immortal in more ways than you can imagine. Stop thinking of time like it's the pinnacle of all meaning, it's a social construct. When I was a child there was no such thing. There was the light and dark and that was it. We ate when we were hungry, we slept when we were tired. There was no one or no thing like time telling me where I had to be,” I told him and he smiled.
“I've missed you,” he whispered and I smiled back, wondering why my speech provoked that emotion. I projected this thought into his mind and his eyes closed slightly for a second before opening again.
“It's funny. The only reason I was with Nicole was because she reminded me of you. After a few years I made myself stop comparing you. No one was ever going to be you for me. You captured me from the moment I met you and I've only ever wanted to know you better. Those short times we spent together when I was human was the best in my life, not because you were beautiful or unattainable, but because everything about you captivated me, I wanted to learn everything about you, about your past, about the history of the world even,” he said laughing at the end. “You're timeless and everything you just said is the reason I fell for you in the first place. I know you thought I was immature and Jesus, I was. I still can be now,” he said pausing as he winked at me. “But having known you and left you behind and moved on with my life made me realise how much I wanted to be a better person so that one day you would be standing right here in my arms and want to spend time with me again.”
I didn't know how to reply to that. I'd only loved a few in my lifetime, truly loved them and yet Zac was like none of them in my past. I knew he wasn't my mate, I wasn't even sure I had one. Three thousand and six hundred years old and I still hadn't met my true other half and he knew that too, somewhere inside him but that didn't mean that we didn't deserve to be happy, for however long this would last. I wanted to try it. I had learnt that you can have many loves they don't necessarily mean less to you than your soul mate and are just as important. They teach you how to love in the current phase of your life and I had a feeling Zac would teach me many things.
I stretched onto my toes to kiss him, this time a little stronger and he returned the kiss, pulling me flush against his stone body. I felt my body reacting to his temperature making him feel warmer to me.
After that night Zac and I stayed friendly distance apart until the Cullen’s returned to the US. We didn't stay in contact, I wanted nothing to do with his healing process in fear of corrupting it. It was about a year after our first kiss that I walked out onto one of the many balconies of my house, a few miles from the Volturi. I knew he was outside my house. I felt his presence the second he decided which direction he was running. I leant over the banister of the balcony to find him below  waiting for me. I watched as he bent his knees and prepared to jump. Seconds later he was in front of me. The dew of morning mist covering his skin, hair and clothes. He smirked at me. The signature Zac smile and I couldn't help but smile back.
That smile would be my life for nearly forty years. He would get me through the death of my granddaughter and support me in everything I did. He lay with me on the few nights I slept and on the other nights encompass my every thought and desire. Our relationship had been built on my need for him after the loss of my granddaughter and it propelled me into surviving for my daughters. The last decade of our relationship I had began searching for new ways to cope with Allesandra's death including how to bring her back. This had forced us apart, he was adamant that moving on was the answer whilst I was stuck in time, stuck in denial that my daughters would have to live this pain forever.
"Esther" he said for the third time after I ignored him. I was in our study, surrounded by books I had recently received from a witch friend from Asia. So far there had been nothing on what I needed with resurrection. Zac moved and threw the book I was holding out of my hand and dropped it to the floor.
"Es," he said again and I sighed as I looked up at him. He was the only person in this world that was allowed to call me that.
"Per favore, vita mia. Please stop," he pleaded as he fell to his knees in front of me. He had picked up Italian in the years he lived here with me, adopting many of the typical terms of endearments. His favourite being 'my life'.
I had been in here for the last three solid days, not moving from the library I had started to collect. I hadn't even given him the time of day since I got those books three days ago but he was still here, still around when I needed him.
This was thirty five years of a relationship. For a human that would be considered an extremely successful marriage and he was my husband, in every way possible except in writing.
"Remember when we had our first real kiss?" I asked him, his hand encompassing my own in my lap. My gaze fell to them between us.
"Of course," he murmured, stroking my thumb softly, a gesture he knew comforted me.
"I told you about time and what it's like for me. That I don't feel it unless I'm watching a child grow." I reminded him.
"I remember every word," he clarified in his soft voice. A voice he had adapted since the death of Allesandra when he knew she was on my mind. A voice that was like my home, he knew exactly how and what to say in those early years and that had led me to love him more than I have loved anyone since Darius.
"That's what it's like for me now. I can't see time passing, it still feels like yesterday. I still see her. every time I close my eyes or sleep. Every time my life flashes before my eyes. I see her burning. I see her crying out for help. I see myself failing to protect her. My little Alexandra." I said, a sob on the verge of escaping. "I see her in our garden, I see her standing by her mother and brother. I see her watching us, still so small and still so beautiful. She didn't have a chance to change Zac, she didn't age, she didn't grow. She's still the same. Time hasn't changed her like it should have and that kills me," I whispered, a single tear falling from my eyes. Zac had of course heard this before. He knew I saw her in her spirit form, never speaking just present. Not often just occasionally. I saw her maybe once or twice a year and it killed me every time. My daughters had no idea about this. I kept it hidden from everyone but Eddie and Zac. They knew, they knew everything but I wanted to save everyone else the pain of knowing she wasn't at peace.
"You'll find a way. I know you will" he said, emotion coating his own voice. "You are the most amazing person I have ever met. There is nothing in this world that you can't do," he said catching my eyes. I leant forward, kissing him softly and he tugged me into a hug.
Over the next four years, Zac and I drifted. I loved him with all my heart but I couldn't give him what he needed, or he what I needed. I was consumed with my mission to return Allesandra to her family and he wanted me back, the me that spent twenty years barely thinking of Allesandra, except when around my daughters of course, no one could escape Allesandra when Lidiya was around. Those twenty years had been amazing but it was the day i was given True Sight and I saw my granddaughter wasn't at peace that shook me to my core.
Zac had supported me completely, offered to help in any way he could but as the task consumed me, our faux marriage began to fracture. It wasn't fair for me to do this to him and he deserved better.
We parted on good terms, he stayed for a few years after, being there for me when I needed but I began to make travel plans, visiting various experts around the world to aid my quest and he eventually went back to America. He fell right back into the family he wanted and began to live life as a Cullen.
I continued to live my life, helping my daughters when i could and continuing the research i could until the day i brought my granddaughter back to life nearly forty years later.
"You did it" i heard Zac's voice across the court room as i was about to leave the empty court room. We had just presented Allesandra to the guard and everyone made their way into the less formal area of the castle to celebrate her return. I span on my feet to see Zac standing at the doors. Still the same as the day he left for America.
Zac's eyes focused on mine across the room and I took the strides i needed to reach Zac and he pulled me into a hug.
"i know its been a while" he whispered, i didn't know why he was whispering but it was oddly appropriate in the large quiet room.
"I'm glad you came to see me" i said back, my face pressed into his shoulder as he continued to hug me.
"Actually Es, i came to see that beautiful granddaughter of yours. I wanted to see for myself that you had done it," he said as we pulled away. His hand fell to mine as he began softly stroking my thumb like it was instinct. I smiled up at him.
"I did it." I clarified and he let out his signature smirk.

"I always knew you would." 

3 comments:

  1. Wow!!! This took many emotions to get through!I think this is one of my favorites, the only part I didn't agree with is the part that said his wife didn't love him bcuz she killed herself. I used to think people that killed themselves were cowards bcuz they took the easy way out but anymore who knows what can go through a person's mind, death is so final and the mere thought of death usually scares people so how much courage does it take to do it or how much pain is one gong through to face that horrific fear and kill yourself? I always get into discussions with you (not for awhile) and you're an intelligent person so you always give me honest answers even tho most of the time we don't see eye to eye (mostly bcuz we live in different worlds with different views) but I thought I would share that thought with you.

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    1. Hehe thank you for your comment DJ! Its been so long i know, as ive aged ive just stayed out of conflict haha, i dont use social media anymore, all i have is my FF twitter. And yes i knew when i wrote the suicide bit it would be controversial but i wanted to keep it in because i wanted it to show that even though Esther is 4000 yrs old she can be still naive at some things. Shes never read the mind of someone thats contemplating suicide, shes only had Edwards ability a hundred years of her life, she still has a lot to learn really when it comes to the way the human mind works. I wrote this a while ago and reading back i didnt really touch on it enough that Zac and his wife were very estranged before her death but in her note she did say it wasnt his fault, so i tried to say with that line that she actually didnt love him before she died or she might not have felt as alone. but yes suicide is a horrible thing and i cant imagine what its like really. I just wanted to write Esther and Zac's story a little, since this pair has always been a guilty pleasure of mine even though i knew they werent meant to be together forever.

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  2. I was so happy when I saw the updates, your fanfics are the only ones I really am able to stick with and read over and over again.

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